How I've Prostituted Myself

Well… not prostitution in the sense of a profession. However, I have sold my principles, values, integrity, truth for money, even time with my kids. I have done the ridiculous and dishonorable to save a dollar. I need to steward the finances well, right?! (Wink Wink)

I grew up with meager means. My clothes in grade school came from second hand stores. 

Finances have always been a sensitive subject to me. I have this looming lie--“There is never enough.”

Last year, we hired a contractor to install quartz counters into our gutted kitchen. Our cabinets and quartz counters were purchased from a local builder’s kitchen showroom. We got an amazing deal.  Because it's all about the money, money (name that tune?)

The cabinets were a modern gray. They were lovely compared to our outdated oak cathedral style cabinets that came with the house.

Enter Eddie, the counter guy.  (I changed his name to protect the guilty) He would be installing the Quartz counters that came with the cabinets.  

Do you hear that? It’s excitement filling the air. I had been doing back breaking dishes in the tub. Blah. After 6 weeks we would finally get a sink!  

When Eddie arrived, he changed the initial deal. He wasn’t going to seam pieces together. He informed me that I needed to purchase… a… whole… new… slab.



Eddie had been with us on this entire journey starting at the showroom.  At this moment, after our savings had dwindled to meager means, he tells me that I needed to buy a whole slab?! 

It was my breaking point after the other "nightmare, horrific, NEVER going to renovate again" occurrences. I embarrassingly started to cry. 

Fast forward a few days later. Eddie is working at the house when I arrived.  I calmly confronted him, with a smile on my face (probably more like passive aggressively.) 

“I am mad at you; I'm not happy about this situation.”  Those were my exact words. I explained that if the situation happened to him again with another homeowner,  it would be good idea to let the homeowner know upfront, they would need to purchase a whole slab, not a remnant to seam together, like he had led me to believe.  

He quietly grabbed his sink. Picked up the templates off the garage floor, and left. I went on my merry way and considered the situation and realized….maybe he left mad. So I texted my husband who got to the bottom of the situation. Eddie had in fact left ticked. 

Hmmph, I was shocked. It wasn’t a fight. It wasn’t an argument. It was a conversation. Period.

I had mixed feelings. I calmly confronted the guy on his deceitfulness and unprofessionalism.  Apparently, he was insecure, easily offended, and not a fan of confrontation.  Now, here we were without a sink, counter tops, and a full functioning kitchen. [Insert SCREAM.]

So, do I go groveling back to the guy because he was going to be cheap and affordable? We needed cheap. We were WAY over budget. I feel like this was a possible prostitution moment.

Eddie was obviously deceitful and without character on this issue. Should I compromise my values in spite of deceit? Do I compromise truth for money? Do I sell the quality of principles for money? Are these things worth compromising to save money?

I decided. I didn’t want someone who would lie, bait & switch me. I was done. Even if it’s going to cost me more money, I will walk away with my integrity and values, rather than contributing to someone being a switcharoo! 

I’ve made decisions based on finances instead of what God wants me to do.  Basing a decision on finances makes finances a god.  Maybe He wants to be Jehovah Jireh and provide supernaturally for me. God, forgive me for allowing finances to dictate my life. The truth is there is always enough with Him!


So next time the occasion arises...Will you sell yourself for money, or will you keep your integrity, values and principles?


rss Block
Select a Blog Page to create an RSS feed link. Learn more.